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Faith Beyond with Tim Maceyko
Finding life success and fulfillment after adversity strikes is hard. We can be left questioning what it all means, why we are here, and how we go on. The Faith Beyond Podcast delves into topics like grief and loss, dealing with addiction, and various other forms of trauma and extreme adversity. Faith Beyond is about learning how each of us can use the pain of today for a better tomorrow.
The podcast also presents information about health and fitness, including both Eastern and Western beliefs and views on how we can improve our overall health. The show even takes a look at various belief systems found around the world and why individuals believe the way they do. At Faith Beyond, we present concepts, but never tell you what to think.
Author, Speaker, and Coach Tim Maceyko acts as your host, bringing valuable insight on overcoming adversity based on his personal experiences. At the age of sixteen, Tim was left with a broken neck, paralyzed after an automobile accident. He instantly went from a talented young athlete to a paraplegic, relying on others to take care of his every need. The accident changed his life trajectory, but in time, he learned to feed and bathe himself again. Eventually, he got out of his wheelchair and hasn't stopped since. He went on to become a successful coach. But tragedy struck a second time, when later in life, Tim and his wife lost their five-year-old son in a bunk bed accident. And then, a few years after the loss of their son, their teenage daughter was diagnosed with cancer. The hits kept coming.
Yet through it all, Tim has found a way to survive and thrive. He believes that those who have experienced trauma and/or extreme adversity are best positioned to find higher levels of life success and fulfillment. He espouses the value of Post Traumatic Growth (PTG) which can only be experienced by those who have faced the trauma. Tim even shares his secret Fulfillment Formula, a way to find success despite life's setbacks.
Faith Beyond with Tim Maceyko
Embracing the Trials of Adoption: A Minister's Tale of Faith and Family
When ordained minister Jerry Snavely opened up about his arduous journey through adoption, it was a reminder of the sheer tenacity of the human spirit. He and his wife transformed their trials into a celebration of family and faith, a story that's both moving and inspirational.
Our conversation with Jerry brings to light the intimate dance between prayer and action, showing that divine communication is much more than a monologue—it's a heart-to-heart with the universe that guides us through the stormiest of times. From the gripping narrative of a youth pastor's fostering journey to the complexities of kinship care faced by adoptive parents, we unravel tales of resilience, sacrifice, and unexpected turns that challenge and enrich one's faith.
Be sure to follow us for ongoing support and insights into living a life anchored in faith, no matter where that journey may lead. Jerry's story, and those like it, stand as a testament to the power of unwavering hope and the profound impact of opening our hearts to the children of our communities.
Note: Music in this episode includes "I'm Saying Yes" by Beza and "Our Time" by Bex. Both songs are licensed for Faith Beyond use through PremiumBeat.com.
Host Tim Maceyko is an author, coach, and motivational speaker. His publications include "When the Cardinal Calls," "Child Loss 101," and "Seth's Snuggle Time Game," all available for purchase on Amazon. For book signings, speaking events, or media interviews, he can be reached at TimMaceyko@gmail.com.
Disclaimer: The Faith Beyond with Tim Maceyko Podcast is intended purely for informational, educational, inspirational, or entertainment purposes. The views expressed by guests are their own and may not reflect those of Faith Beyond. Listeners should independently verify any presented information and draw their own conclusions. Episodes discussing fitness and health are intended to examine various ideas that might offer health advantages. Faith Beyond with Tim Maceyko neither endorses any specific viewpoint nor advocates for any particular fitness or health regimen. It is recommended that individuals seek advice from their healthcare providers before initiating any new fitness or health plan. Comments made by host Tim Maceyko are presented to the listeners from a coaching standpoint, as he is not a licensed counselor or physician. The host's remarks are intended for inspirational and motivational purposes only.
Beyond the pain, beyond the adversity, beyond this life. It's Faith Beyond, author, coach and Faith Beyond founder. Tim Maseko explores grief, loss, overcoming adversity and so much more. The Faith Beyond podcast starts now.
Tim Maceyko:Hey, Tim Maceyko here. Welcome to another edition of Faith Beyond. Boy, I am ready to go. Today, I've got Jerry Snavely with me, and Jerry is an awesome guy. We are going to be talking about his amazing story, some of the difficulties with it, and how an adoption went from a difficult moment to a place of joy and wonder. So, Jerry's going to share his story with us, but before we do, as always, I like to kind of kick things off with something a little positive. So today I'm bringing you five things that you can do to keep the faith after you face some trauma, turmoil, or difficulty in your life., Jerry, welcome to the show.
Jerry Snavely:It's great to be with you and a neat office that you have here, that you have set up to do this podcast. I'm just very impressed. So glad to be here and thanks for having me.
Tim Maceyko:I'm glad you made it. Yeah, you actually came into the studio. Not a lot of people are able to come to the studio just because a lot of them are remote and out of state in different places. But I'm glad you're local and we set this up and got you in here. Yeah, it turned out pretty well after some time and money and effort, but it's a nice little home studio. So, Jerry, you are an ordained minister. First of all, let's talk about that before we really get too far into things.
Jerry Snavely:Yeah, basically I grew up in church. church. Uh, maybe some of you will be able to relate to that. Uh, some of you that'll be foreign and that's fine, but yeah, I just grew up in church. L earning to fall in love with the L ord and maybe, like a lot of people, spent a little bit of time in those teenage years doing what we would all consider, uh, the foolish years a little bit. Maybe I didn't walk the faith, looking back, like I would have loved to have done.
Jerry Snavely:Um, but eventually kind of got that ship straightened out a little bit, spent time at bible college studying then ordained. I was basically doing youth ministry. Uh, my whole life, I never really had a preaching ministry. I just always focused on the young people and that. But yeah, that's been my main vocation for the past several years. Here of late, I still do that on a part-time basis, but I have a full-time painting vocation now as well.
Tim Maceyko:You do a great job on the painting. I said I was going to get a quote from you before you leave here today for my hallway.
Jerry Snavely:There you go.
Tim Maceyko:So, you're a minister. I was going to ask that question to you too. But before you get too far into this, at what stage of the of the game so someone out there listening and they're maybe feeling that kind of a calling like how did you know? Like that's where I was meant to be.
Jerry Snavely:Yeah, and what age did you realize that? I mean, that's, that's a good question. Um, I would really tell you too that there isn't an answer. That's pat. You know, someone can feel called to that at a very young age. Um, someone may get called to that in their 30s, you just never. I mean, the lord's timing is the lord's and his call on your life is his personal call on your life. He doesn't live in a box and he doesn't put you in a box, and so for me, I would just simply tell you, or anyone that's going to be listening is just listen to him and see.
Jerry Snavely:And ministry also takes on all kinds of different shapes and forms and sizes. Yeah, there's ordained ministers who are preaching in pulpits and working in churches. We need those, but we also need ministers who are janitors, who are teachers, who are just amongst the people, and so don't always just get simply caught up in the fact that I have to be an ordained minister to minister. We're all called to be ministers, we're all called to share the gospel. We're all shared, called to share the love of jesus christ, and so with that, I would just say, man, when you just feel the lord's leading and he's opening up a door for you to walk through. Whatever that may look through. I would just encourage you to walk through it. That may look through.
Tim Maceyko:I would just encourage you to walk through it, fair enough, fair enough. So people that listen to this show I think mostly are probably Christian oriented. I feel pretty confident in saying that, although I think we probably have some other people who are struggling with that because of the circumstance they went through, and maybe they say, yeah, I don't buy into it or whatever, and that's fine. That's fine If you're. I don't buy into it or whatever, and that's fine, that's fine if you're listening.
Tim Maceyko:Don't run away from this episode, right? We want to still have those conversations and I think it's valuable to always look at a wide variety of the way things may or may not be Like. None of us have all the answers, but we try to educate ourselves and embrace what we feel strongly about. So today, jerry, let's kick things off just by talking about these five things to help keep the faith, and this can mean keeping the faith in the sense of God and Jesus and all the Christianity type things, but also this may mean keep the faith as in don't lose hope from wherever you're at in your life, because maybe you're struggling right now. So I think these five things are really valuable, so let's go over them. Number one is to well, it comes to number five actually. But is love? Love one another, love yourself, love.
Jerry Snavely:Yeah, I mean foundational, um, cornerstone type stuff. Uh, with love, um, you know, without love, I mean you do you feel lonely, you feel you feel isolated, you feel desolate, you feel empty. And love is really just the cornerstone of not just your faith religiously, but just also just in life. And once again, god, you know if you want to go to scripture, you know he was asked, you know what's the greatest commandment? He said love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, your mind, soul and strength. And then he says but the second's like it love your neighbor as yourself. And so god gives us love, god wants us to love him. But he also realizes what the world really does need is love, just to show someone that you care and that you're invested in them.
Tim Maceyko:And that can just make a total, radical difference in someone's life is just that they feel loved I was talking to a father the other day who I got in touch with from someone listening to the podcast, reached out to me and said hey, my brother, brother-in-law, one or the other, forget exactly, but this relation lost his child. It was on a four-wheeler, basically, and it flipped, wrecked and the child unfortunately passed. And a lot of guilt and a lot of struggle and I think for men, you know, we don't like to go to therapy, we don't like to go to groups and talk in these groups, right, and and so it was very, I was very blessed that he was willing to call me and and have a conversation one-on-one, because he was struggling and I'm not a minister, I'm not a doctor, I'm just a guy who went through something similar, and so we were able to connect and he said something about this love thing right here. He said you know, if it wasn't for my wife and the rest of the family, I don't think I would make it, I don't think I'd be here, and so I think the point I'm making here is this If you're out there right now and you're struggling and we're talking about the things that help you, keep the faith, love to me is number one.
Tim Maceyko:I mean the bottom line, because if you have that love and you understand that you still have more to life, it's going to get better, there's going to be better days. Just hold on to that love and that passion you have for those around you. Don't give up on that. All right, number four it comes in. Number four, it says just move, move, get out and do something with yourself. Yeah.
Jerry Snavely:No, I would echo that and I would agree with it and I enjoy doing that personally.
Jerry Snavely:As I mentioned, I paint vocationally.
Jerry Snavely:Now is what I do for 40 hours a week or so, so very active in that, a lot of ups and downs in the days of a life of a painter, but anyway I get out and move and above and beyond that, I referee basketball in the wintertime months, and so I like to get out and do that and enjoy that part of it and then, just to be ready for that, through the off season I'll get out and run some and then do some exercising just at home just to try to stay fit, and so I would encourage you too that it really does do your mind well to have your body doing well. And once again, to me, if we don't use that, we do tend to lose it and it can maybe help with some aches and pains and different things that you might be having If you just get out and move and use that body that God gave you. And because we are a pretty sedentary lifestyle anymore, with a lot of the jobs that different people have, and I think as a result of that, we just don't feel good because we don't move. So yeah, I echo that man get out and move, find something to do, have fun with it.
Tim Maceyko:Absolutely, I agree, and I think I'm going to do a separate episode on. Someone's going to come in and talk about fitness and exercise the whole enchilada. So we'll talk about another one. And then also I got another episode coming up later about connecting to nature and what they call grounding, where you're barefoot and just connecting yeah, so grounding where you're barefoot and just connecting. Yeah, so some cool stuff there and we'll talk about that. Other shows, uh, but number three today is on the list.
Jerry Snavely:Be kind, be kind to yourself and be kind to those around you yeah um, I mean, that's just once again it can really dovetail off of love, because love is, you know, exhibiting kindness. And to me, as we think about this, once again, if we just simply look at scripture and it just talks about you know, how do you want to treat people the way you want to be treated? Yeah, and so if we can just simply learn it, man, how would the world look different if we could adopt that, if I would just simply treat someone the way I wanted to be treated. I realize it's a lot easier to say that than do it. We have bad days, we have difficult times and sometimes we're just grumpy, but if we can learn to just try to be more kind, just what a difference it would be and uh and just putting a smile on someone's face and then you end up having a smile on your face just because we're kind.
Tim Maceyko:So yep, be kind to one another one thing I'd add on that too, is I talked to a girl on a different episode, young lady, and she was just really hard on herself and I asked her I said well, you know, if your friend came in and they put on 100 pounds you haven't seen him for two years and uh, would you, would you tell them they're fat? She said, well, no, I would never do that. I'm like well, would you tell your friend who failed a test they're stupid? She's like I would never do that. I'm like well, would you tell your friend who failed a test that they're stupid? She's like no, I would never do that. I'm like. Then, why are you so hard on yourself, like it's so hard? Sometimes we're harder on ourselves and we need to be kind to ourselves as well.
Jerry Snavely:Yeah, I mean, and it's good to have expectations of ourselves and to have goals and to want to do well, but at the same time, sometimes we don't do everything well, sometimes we have bad days and and it's okay. Um, and, like I say, just be a little forgiving and and move on and a tomorrow can be a better day, and just to try to handle situations better, or whatever it might be. I like it.
Tim Maceyko:Uh, number two is be thankful. Gratitude.
Jerry Snavely:Yeah, man, just an attitude of gratitude. Um, I know we have a a thing that we have said with all of our children. It's basically this anytime anybody does anything for you, say thank you. Anytime anybody does anything for you, be thankful. And the reason we just simply want to do that is it then becomes not what you do, it becomes who you are. Yeah, and I become a thankful person. Thank you for having me here today, thank you for doing this, thank you for opening up the door for me, thank you for doing that and thank you for supper, thank you for doing the dishes, thank you for and, if it may, just all of a sudden, it's like I'll become a thankful person and if we can just learn to maybe look at things through that lens, then maybe we can be a little more of a better attitude and being happy with what's going on and having a little gratitude in our lives.
Tim Maceyko:I agree. I agree, and sometimes too, again, when you're suffering out there and you're feeling down and it's hard to be thankful, but remember what you should be thankful for, for things you do have. We focus on the things that we've lost, things we don't have, and it's a natural reaction, but, in order to keep the faith, think about the things you do have and be thankful for them, whether it's your health or your loved ones or whatever's left in your life.
Jerry Snavely:Classic, good old story that go along with that is the guy who complained about having or needing new shoes to the gentleman who had no feet. Yeah, yeah.
Tim Maceyko:Yeah.
Jerry Snavely:Yeah, you know, and you're sitting and think, oh, wow, and sometimes we do, and I don't know some people listen to us. I mean you've experienced great grief but at the same time, you typically don't have to look too far down the road to find someone who has gone through more, and so, yeah, you just be grateful for where you're at, absolutely.
Tim Maceyko:Number one is to keep the faith is pray.
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Jerry Snavely:Yeah, just um, just praying and just, uh, talking to the Lord. Um, he I mean, if I believe scripture, he knows what's going on anyway he knows. He just simply desires to have a relationship with you. He desires to have you convey to him everything that's going on with you. One thing you have to realize is he has very broad shoulders and you're not going to offend him If you're going through a difficult time or through a season that you simply don't understand. He can handle you saying, god, I am not happy with you right now, and he would say I get it, you're going through a rough time, I understand it. Just give him everything. Just give it to him, let him sort it out.
Jerry Snavely:The biggest thing is just having that communication, talking to him, but then being willing to listen, being willing to have patience, being willing to understand that he sees the big picture. You're only seeing a little glimpse of it right now and perhaps in time you'll look back at this season and you'll be able to see the whys and the hows and the what bores. That right now just isn't making any sense to you. Um, but just talk to him about it. Talk to him about everything. That's what he wants you to do. Yeah, I love that.
Tim Maceyko:I love that, and and you know, steve harvey, the comedian, said he does this. He said he you know he lives in the morning, but he said very first two things. He does is he meditates, he listens and then he prays. He talks, so he listens for those messages and then he prays on what he thinks he needs to respond with and ask for and pray for the health of others and those types of things. So I think that's really profound, the idea of listen and talk to him both. I think that's a great idea.
Tim Maceyko:Okay, well, I'll tell you what that's a great list, a great way to kick things off, a way to keep the faith, five things you can do. So, if you're struggling, think about it, and hopefully you'll feel a little bit better. We're going to take our break when we come back, though. I'm going to let Jerry talk about his story and the story of adoption and how it kind of was a rollercoaster ride for you, and you really questioned some things, but it all turned out wonderful, didn't it? Amen, yes, sir, we'll do that right after the song of the week.
Speaker 4:This is Tim Maseko with Jerry Snavely and you're listening to Faith Beyond out today. Cause the good things coming my way Pay my dues. I deserve a break. Gonna, look up to heaven. Yeah, I'm expecting blessings here today. I'm saying yes to better days. Yes, I'm on my way. Yes, it's gonna be okay. Yeah, I'm saying yes To better days. Yes, I'm on my way. Yes, it's gonna be okay. Yeah, climbed a mountain just to see the top. Looking down now see how far I've come. Gonna, take a deep breath. Enjoy while I can. The best is yet to come Cause the good things coming my way Pay my dues. I deserve a break. Gonna, look up to heaven. Yeah, I'm expecting blessings here today.
Speaker 4:I'm saying yes to better days. Yes, I'm on my way. Yes, it's gonna be okay. Yeah, I'm saying yes to better days. Yes, I'm on my way. Yes, it's gonna be okay. Yeah, all that's left is to have a little fun. Never be too serious and numb, cause life is too short to stay up on the shore. Gonna, dive into the sun, cause the good things come in my way. Bye. Yes, I'm on my way. Yes, it's gonna be okay. Yeah, I'm saying yes to better days. Yes, I'm on my way. Yes, it's gonna be okay.
Tim Maceyko:Yeah, all right, we are back and again I got jerry snavely with me. He's an ordained minister and what's? What's school did you go to for that like?
Tim Maceyko:cincinnati bible college, which is no longer even in existence, sadly, wow yeah, schools come and go, though right yeah, unfortunately it it does um, and also you know we're talking earlier, we're talking about moving in our list of five things. You mentioned the fact you're an official and, yeah, you were recognized this year in ohio as what the girls basketball official of the year for the whole state. Is that right? That?
Jerry Snavely:is. It was a very humbling, uh, very surprising and uh it was. It was a very unique honor and uh and appreciate it, but also very humbled by it, because I know there are a lot of great officials in the state of ohio, so to be recognized that way was. I actually laughed when I first saw the letter. It's like you gotta be kidding me.
Tim Maceyko:No, I think it's great, I mean you know, obviously I coached, yeah, and so this is one of the ways I know jerry is from. Uh, you officiated many of my high school girls basketball games when I was coaching and, and, uh, I always, always objectively, thought it's not just because you're sitting in the studio, but I always said that you were one of the best, like consistent, and you would explain things and you, you know, whether I agree with the call or not made no difference. You're very on point with it and you just really embrace people in a manner that makes it easy to talk to, and I think that goes a long way yeah, yep.
Jerry Snavely:I mean, hey, we, we get most of them right, some of them we don't. And if I didn't felt like I got it right, I'm going to tell you that, and if you didn't felt like I got it right, I'm just going to simply say well, this is what I saw yeah, well, and from a coaching perspective, I always had the right answer, the official, you know, sometimes they.
Intro:They got it wrong.
Tim Maceyko:I always had it right yeah that's how it works exactly exactly you need that. W yeah, yeah, I always said officiating is the toughest job because you make half the gym mad, no matter what your call is Exactly.
Jerry Snavely:Exactly Yep, for sure.
Tim Maceyko:All right. Well, let's get into your story now. I think this is an important thing to share, and I noticed my dogs are coming and going out of their rooms. So if people hear a little clacking here and there, I apologize. But you know the wife is gone and the dogs are active, so I keep hearing them in my headphones. So I I apologize if you hear that, but it is what it is. Um, that's the joy of podcasting from your home studio. There you go, there you go, but let's go ahead and talk about it.
Tim Maceyko:So you weren't looking to adopt yeah or anything like that, right once this all came about yeah, not at all.
Jerry Snavely:Um, just to give you some, where I'm at, I'm 56 years old now, so when this story started back in 2019, you can do the math at the age I was. And so just to try to get you to what's going on, we have another family in the church that does foster care and they would take in a lot of times teenagers, and at that time I was the youth pastor. So they would bring in young people into their home and as youth pastor, I would meet them at church and just introduce myself and invite them to youth group and things of that nature. With this one particular Sunday in February of 19, they bring in this young lady into their home and and I see her at church and I go up and introduce myself to her and little did I know. She came in tow at that time with a two-month-old little guy and she was 15 at the time. And so I just do like I did with all the kids and just struck up a conversation, got to know her a little bit and invited her to youth group, and she says, well, what do I do with him? I says, was he yours? She said, yeah, well, then you bring him. And so she did. She came that night and she brought this little guy to youth group with us and, and so we just started this relationship with her and and, just like we would any other young person that comes to church, you just try to love on and meet them where they're at and do whatever you can. So it's not very long into the relationship with her and having them at youth group, we kind of realized she's in over her head, as you could imagine, being a 15-year-old single mom. So we just build this relationship with her.
Jerry Snavely:My wife gets a phone call a couple months later from the foster mom and she says this young lady is going to ask you and Jerry to take her baby. And Debra's like what? And so this is what she's going to do. And so I'm at work and so Debra calls me and informs me of this and I'm like, wait, what did you say? She's going to ask us to take her baby. She wants us to become the legal guardians of this little boy. And obviously it's like you know sometimes you say, hey, can you handle the curveball? We didn't even know we were playing the game. That's how far out of left field this came. So I hang up with my wife, and so I just start praying. I just you know, man, lord, this is wow. And so I just start praying and just asking and and and, and.
Jerry Snavely:There was a few different times in this story where I would tell you that I I heard the voice of the lord and never really been an audible thing for me, it's just more of a impressed upon my spirit. But as I'm praying, he simply gives me three words, and the three words were simply selfish, selfless, choose. And so I start contemplating those words. Lord, what do you mean? We have three grown children, and the youngest at that time was just getting ready to graduate college. We were literally like months away of being empty nesters and we had saved money to do a little traveling and whatever. And to me it was just simply like the lord was saying hey, you had your plans, if you want to do that, just go and do it. But it's kind of being selfish, or you can simply be selfish. So I just prayed about it and I simply decided that, yeah, we could go see stuff or we could make a difference in someone's life, and so that's what we decided to do. And so she, uh, gave us this little guy and, uh, we had him for 10 days in our home when he's four months old. Well then, the day before we go to court to um, have this become legal guardians? She changes her mind and, uh, she says I want him back. And so she comes and get him and, uh, and that was fine, I. But I just simply asked her you know what's changed? You gave him to us because you knew you couldn't care for him. What's changed in 10 days? And she just simply said I just want to be his mom. Okay, that's fine. So we gave him back and she went, and so we just continued to build this relationship and love on him the best we could, and we did that.
Jerry Snavely:Unfortunately for the young lady, come November of 2019, she'd made some poor choices in between there as well, but then the biggest poor decision she made came in November of 2019. And she actually left with Kai of the foster home and went away on a Saturday, and then so the foster parents came to church on Sunday morning and they informed us. She ran away, she took him and they're gone. And so, obviously, you're just, you're you just? You're just running the gamma of fear, hope, um man, just pray and they're okay. So we go over to the home, uh, after church and we just spend the afternoon there.
Jerry Snavely:I have to run and do some errands to get things ready for youth group that night and as I'm coming back from kroger, I'm pulling into the road that they live on and I see this young lady and the baby and she's walking down the road to get back home, and so I I just drive up and I get him and put him in the car, and it's November and the little guy, he doesn't even have a coat on, and I just remember that they just got in the front seat with me. But it was so incredible, his eyes and my eyes met and it was literally like I could look into his soul and and we just connected. So we, we take him back home or back to the foster home, and and we realize at that point that you know she's going to lose him, you know they're going to, they're going to take him. So I just told my wife, hey, get out in front of this, we don't want him going into foster care, we'll take him in a kinship relationship, and and so that's what we do, we take him into our home, and then she decides to let us adopt him and really I know we don't have a whole lot of time here, but we're willing to do anything to help her. We have been willing to adopt her and we start that process because we want them to stay together, we want them to be a family.
Jerry Snavely:But as we start that process of adopting her just to keep it short, basically just we just weren't going to offer to her the lifestyle she wanted to live, and it's like she wanted it for kai, but she didn't want it for herself and she just wasn't willing to do that. So she went the direction she wanted to go and and chose to go, and so we ended up with Kai and she wanted us to adopt him all along. So we proceeded with that and we were once again two weeks away to go to court for an uncontested adoption. And she changes her mind and she comes back in and says no, I want to, I want to, so we have to.
Jerry Snavely:And you might say at this point well, that's why would you not want her to have her son? And it wasn't that we didn't, and we were willing to work with her once again. I mean, if you can, if you can change and you can do things and and, but she just it was just toxic. And I guess sometimes, as listening to this story, you just have to believe that we know things about her that you don't know as listeners right now, and you just have to trust us that we felt we were fighting for his, literally fighting for his life, to keep him safe yeah, let me interject here, jerry, just because I I know that, um, you know that did uh, I don't want to say this.
Tim Maceyko:I worked at children's services for a little while, for about a year, and it was a temporary layover between that and my next position in life, but I worked with a lot of foster kids and foster youth and that was kind of one of my roles and so I definitely, you know, saw what you're talking about and so if you're listening, it's easy, when you don't see those things, to think, well, yeah, you want to back with the parent and in theory you do, because that's a hard thing for a child to not be with the parent.
Tim Maceyko:But when you see a parent who's struggling, who maybe has an addiction or whatever the case may be, sometimes it's just you have to do what you got to do, and it's never a good thing, it's never an easy thing, but you have to think about what's best for the child at that point. And, and boy, I've seen some really heartbreaking cases and it sounds like this is kind of one of those where I think the mom wanted him, but yet she wanted what was better for him, but yet she didn't want to give him up, you know, and she knew, knew. I'm sure she knew that she was in a position that she couldn't do it, yet it was just the idea of making it a permanent move every time probably just got to her yeah I think that's really what it was.
Jerry Snavely:I think that's a great way to to state it was. Did she love him? Yes, could she give him what she needed to give him? She knew she couldn't right, but at the at, so that she was, there was literally this wrestling match going on inside of her absolutely and uh, and we got that and we understood it, but we still, we just feared for him absolutely and uh, and that was where we were at, and so what ended up happening is then we ended up having to go through a contested adoption.
Jerry Snavely:And you might be saying, some of you are about to say, isn't there a dad involved in this? Well, of course there is. And, once again, this is just the sadness of the story. If you remember the young lady, she was 15 when we met her, so she was pregnant at 14. And the guy who was with her was 26 at the time when that happened, and so he's actually in prison. It was literally just an absolute roller coaster ride of emotion. Ride of emotion because when she came back to to contest, well then, as they should, they tried to give her every right to earn him back, and so we just had to prepare ourselves, you know, for that. But she, just she couldn't, she, she came back for the first court hearing and never showed up again and just never came back any time. And so there was just this litany of things that had to happen, and we talked about praying earlier and we prayed so hard for this little guy, you know, and it was, it was just praying for his protection.
Jerry Snavely:We did Jericho walks around the courthouse, and you may or may not be familiar with that, but it's just simply a story from the Bible where, basically, god wins the battle just by the Israelites walking around the city of Jericho and he knocks the walls down. And so we just prayed, lord, this is your victory to win, this is your battle to win, and and it's just to protect kai and um, and he did it was. There was just so many miraculous things, even on the jericho walk. Um, we did it. So we walked around the the courthouse seven different sundays uh, six of them. We walked one time and then the seventh. So we walked around the courthouse seven different Sundays, six of them. We walked one time and then the seventh one. We walked seven laps around, just like they did in the Bible story. And the seventh time around, or the seventh Sunday, there was about 100 people showed up from our church to walk with us. And as we're walking around the seventh lap, we're going to sing a couple praise songs at the end of this Jericho walk, but right in front of the courthouse, as we're getting ready to go up to sing, I heard the Lord speak to me again and he said don't pray to me to win it. Praise me because I've won it, and one of our elders was literally just a few steps behind me and not at the same time but at the same place, in front of the courthouse. He said he got a word from the Lord and it simply was I hear you, I hear you, I hear your prayers, you've won. And it's just like like there were still hurdles, there were still bumps in the road.
Jerry Snavely:By the time we were done, I weigh 185 pounds today. By the time we were done, I weighed 169 pounds. At the actual adoption, I weighed 169 pounds. At the actual adoption, I weighed 169 pounds. Just, you literally anguished for him. We fought for him like we were literally saving his life. Yeah, because we felt we were. Yeah, and we did. It was just overwhelming to feel God's presence.
Jerry Snavely:But I guess what I would like to say to your listeners is this it wasn't all mountaintops. There were so many valleys and it was just the ups and downs and just God's faithfulness through it. And that's the part I think sometimes we lose is we think well, maybe because I'm a follower of Christ, it's just all mountaintops and it's all rose petals. No, it's not, because what I tell people today and I believe it with all my heart. God knew I needed to fight for him heart. God knew I needed to fight for him to learn to love him the way I needed to love him.
Jerry Snavely:Had I not had to fight for him, I don't know that I would have loved him to the inch degree that I do today Because of the fight. So many mornings I would wake up and I would pray and I would just cry, I'd just sob for him. Lord, protect him. I can honestly tell you today that Kai Wade Snavely is my son. I love him as much as all my natural-born girls. Nothing will ever change that. He's a little biracial guy. He's my son In every insta-gree, even though everyone that looks at us says there ain't no way.
Tim Maceyko:I say Yahweh.
Jerry Snavely:And if you know anything about scripture, our Lord is known as Yahweh, yeah, yeah, I'll say Yahweh. And if you know anything about scripture, our Lord is known as Yahweh yeah, the provider. So is he, my son, yahweh? And God made a way and that's exactly what he did, and he just saw to protect him, and so that's where we're at in our story.
Tim Maceyko:I've seen your Facebook posts and he just got out of basketball season. It looked like he was having a blast. Yep, looks like he's healthy and happy and really thriving. Yeah, so that's that's. That's a tremendous testament to having faith and and and thanks for sharing that. I think that's going to hopefully help some people by hearing that story and realizing that you know the highs and lows. They come and go and it flows like that.
Tim Maceyko:You know, we are actually technically out of time, but I'm going to take just one more minute because I want to ask you one question from a you know, from a Christian standpoint. Yeah, people out there listening may say you know, well, I lost someone I loved or I got this cancer diagnosis terminal. You know, whatever the case may be and the easy thing to say, the most common thing to say is I was a Christian. I went to you know church every Sunday and, my God, where are you now, when I needed you the most? You've abandoned me and now here, you've left me distraught and tore apart, and I'm on the floor. What do you say to those people Like how, how, what, what do we tell them?
Jerry Snavely:Yeah, I mean, the biggest thing we have to remember as humans is this body is a tent. It is temporary. As nice as this earth is and as beautiful as it is, this is a temporary home inside of each and every one of us, somewhere. I don't know how it works, I can't explain it, I don't know where it's at, but there is a soul that lives inside of every person that God designed to live for an eternity, not in this place, but in a future home that will be a forever home. Biggest thing we have to understand, guys none of us are getting out of this world alive. Unless the Lord chooses to return before we go, then there will be a generation that they won't taste. That you know, because the Lord says I'm coming back. But what happens that we have to understand is is this? You were not created for this world? We're, we're, we're aliens, and scripture tells us that we should, we could be, we should be like an alien in this world. We are just simply passing through to our home. So the biggest thing I can tell you is prepare for that home, be ready, and and that's the goal of of us as a believer and us as a church is to make you acutely aware that you are made for an eternity and the only way that scripture tells us that we have an eternity forever in heaven is to put our faith in jesus christ and and and accept his grace through the, the blood sacrifice on the cross and I know I'm getting pretty deep here on you and and maybe, and it's like whoa, where's this guy going with all this? Reach out to tim. I'll be happy to talk with you personally if you want to know more.
Jerry Snavely:Um, but how do we navigate the difficult times? Is just by simply realizing this. This is not my home. Yeah, I was made. I'm made for something bigger. I'm made for something better, I'm made for something forever. And, uh, doesn't make it easier, it's still. It's still painful, I get it, but the comfort hopefully we can have is just simply knowing that jesus is there to help us navigate that through his leading of the holy spirit. But I guess you know I gave you a long answer to simply this this is not your home, brother or sister, whoever is listening, and just be ready for the future and just get there and navigate this and navigate the hard times, but have your hope in Jesus Christ, because that's the only way, at the end of the day, that's going to be where everything's going to stand, is in your faith in Jesus Christ.
Tim Maceyko:Well said, jerry. I appreciate the honest answer and everybody listen. I hope you got a lot out of today's episode. I know I've I've jot a few things out mentally that I'm going to think about, and even the beginning of the show, the five things we talked about to help you keep your faith, were important, jerry. Your journey with the adoption was amazing, and Jericho walks and and and the the voice of God speaking to you in the way he did, and so just very inspirational, I think, for hopefully a lot of people that are listening, and so thanks for being here, thanks for sharing people that are listening. So thanks for being here, thanks for sharing. Hey, thanks for having me. And that'll do it for this week, and this is Tim Maseko, jerry Snavely, and I will leave you with this message you can overcome any adversity in life. Together, we can overcome, we can achieve, we can go on and do great things with the time we have on this earth. So go do it. It's your time, it's my time.
Speaker 4:It's our time. We don't stop here. We keep on dreaming. Set the goals and we will achieve them. It's our time, it's our time. It will make it count. Oh, watch us close, cause we will grow and become unstoppable, become unstoppable. Oh, we take our dreams and make them real, cause nothing is impossible. It's our time, it's our time and we'll make it count. It's our lives, it's our lives and we'll live it loud. We don't stop and we keep on dreaming. Set the goals and we will achieve them. It's a time, it's a time, and we'll make it count. It's a time, it's a time, and we'll make it count.
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